As a writer should race be a factor in what your work is about?

Maybe this question came into my head since I have been reading Langston Hughes’s essays recently. He was a firm believer in writing what you know. Now, I know that he is not the first to say this but he definitely is one of the first to live by that rule. Race is always a uncomfortable subject, especially when you are dealing with one race being oppressed. Yes, we have come a looong way from those days when life was harder for certain races than it was for others, but there are still some issues that need to be addressed. For the sake of not making any of my followers feel uncomfortable, I will try and just stick to my personal struggles and ideas. As a young aspiring writer I have plenty of ideas for my stories and characters. Whenever I start a story there is always the question of whether or not my main character should be African American simply because I am. Of course I am aware that I have to branch out and not have all my characters resemble me in race. But sometimes I wonder why I should have to feel guilty about making my protagonist African American? Would it make my story any less engaging? Maybe I am scared my writing wouldn’t be taken seriously. But is that my fault? I am scared that if I have a story centered around a black character it might be deemed unbelievable simply because I refuse to submit my work to fit certain stereotypes. None of my characters will speak in slang or be typically “ghetto”. I refuse to do this because I know plenty of black people who are nowhere near what rap songs, and demeaning books and movies depict us to be. Why should I depict my characters as something that I am not even surrounded by? I feel that the large number of African American books depicting ALL their African American characters as such should be reprimanded. Yes, there are black people who speak and act a certain way. Who have come across drugs and prostitution, and maybe aren’t as cultured as others. But trust me, that percentage of them aren’t as high as society would like you to believe. There is nothing wrong with having those characters written about, as long as they are portrayed in a fair and unbiased way. They are making it that much harder for other writers who want to introduce a different type of black character to the world. One who is equally as realistic. I look at novels by Toni Morrison, novels that center around slaves who are illiterate, but there is a story behind it and the book itself isn’t affected by it. Its time that African American writers start speaking for us all and show readers that we are more three dimensional than history has shown.

Let’s face it, first impressions rely heavily on looks. I don’t mean looks, as in how pretty someone is. Looks, as in someone’s style. As much as we all like think that we judge our first impression on personality, secretly, we are eyeing what shoes are being worn, how the said person’s colors are being coordinated. Is this a bad thing? I would like to think not. After all a person can easily mislead you about their personality…..but there is no hiding whether or not someone has style.

I happen to be a 19 year old girl in one of the biggest fashion capitals of the world. I have friends who can get a glimpse of fashion week right out there window twice a year. So what do you do when you live in a playground for fashion designers and models? You keep up…and in any way that you can. The streets of New York are virtually a runway. Its not enough to basically look cute or pretty, you have to stand out. Now some people like to take the Lady Gaga route but , personally I would like to describe my style as the understated showstopper. Mainly because I’m on a very small budget, but mostly because I am one of those firm believers of the saying “less is more”.

So if you’re reading this you probably are a alot like me. Young student trying to make ends meet, you work, go to school, and play in the city. You come across countless girls wearing amazing outfits. Despite the outfit looking like a million bucks, your somewhat trained eye (thanks to years of fashion magazines and window shopping) knows that it didn’t cost a small fortune. This poses the question: how do they do it? Luckily, females in New York have countless resources. There are plenty of blogs, fashion magazines, and how to books helping us all look great for less. For those of us who can’t afford Alexander McQueen and Dior, we have H&M’s , and Forever 21’s in practically every part of the city. We have stores like Century 21 that give discounts you wouldn’t believe on big name brands.

Now that we have so many options available to us, all we have to do is create a new look. In a city where first style impressions are EVERYTHING, coming up with your own look is almost as good as being able to afford designer threads on a daily basis. Almost.

Expectation vs. Reality

I don't know if its just me, but since I've turned 19 I have had almost a completely rapid fear of turning the age of 20. The thought of no longer being a teenager terrifies me for some reason. I feel as if I haven't achieved anything that a smart, ambitious and well adjusted 19 year old should have already have done before she hits the big 2-0. Some people can't wait to get older, the thought of becoming closer to legal drinking age, or finally being considered an adult are all things my friends, and other teens my age are looking forward too. To me, all those perks just seem like consolation prizes to distract us all from the fact that growing up isn't what its cracked up to be....and I've never been much of a drinker anyway.

So this line of thought poses the question: what are realistic expectations regarding getting older? Are there main things that everyone should do before that hit a certain age? Career, romantic, and emotional milestones that we are all supposed to hit before we look back and are much older than we want to be?

I, personally haven't even made a dent in my bucket list. Never travelled further New York, barely finished college (just kind of started actually), and I can say with almost absolute certainty that I have never been in love. Yes, I'm sure that I'm not the only person who is somewhat of an underachiever, but are we normal or are we far behind? I'm not saying that all of us 19 year olds should already have a degree and a million first loves already.....but how do you determine who is going to make it in life and who isn't going to wake up 30 years later regretful?

So I guess the only thing that I can do is just try and wing it like I have the past 19 years. Its harder to convince yourself that you happy than it is to actually be happy. Yes, I would like answers now, like to have a good job, find a stable boyfriend, publish hundreds of bestsellers. But I would rather pace myself, and remember that I might not be as young as I once was, but I still have a lot to look forward to.

Firsts

There is always that breathless, heart stopping moment before you are about to do something that you have never done before. Now that I go back on it, none of my firsts have been particularly life changing....maybe nothing ever is after it has already happened. Maybe I rushed into all of my firsts with people who have meant nothing to me. First kiss, first boyfriend....all people who are practically strangers to me. Are there ever any other firsts for a girl that doesn't involve men or love? I would like to think there are. Firsts are all about innocence and hope. Maybe the first country I will ever go to the first exotic food I will ever taste, the first big goal I will ever reach. People like to go through life believing that there are plenty of milestones to look forward to, and I think that there are. You just have to be optimistic enough to look for them.

In a Nutshell

So I decided that maybe its time for you guys to get to know me a bit. Though at the very moment I'm writing this I have no followers, I hope to change that. To be honest I hate describing myself, I always feel like I'm leaving something out. I usually come off as really boring on paper, and I guess that isn't the best thing to have happen to you if your trying to run a blog. When you really think about it, can anyone ever describe themselves accurately? There are things about yourself that takes forever to figure out. At this very moment there are a million things going on in my head that I don't know how to put down in a way that you guys can all read and not think that I'm a total nutcase.....

So lets start with the basics. Whenever I read someone's work, no matter what type of writing it is, I want to know a little bit about the authors background. Maybe you aren't the same way. Blogs are a bit harder though, the line between sharing creatively and sharing too much is a bit blurry. I tend to put a lot of emotions/personal experiences in my posts, so I would like show what influences me and what I'm surrounded by. Maybe knowing what my life is like, someone might pick up on the reason why certain things happen to me (since I have no idea).

I'm 19 years old and was born and raised in New York. Sadly I've never been anywhere else. Not even another state ( once to South Carolina, where all my family is from, but I was small so it doesn't really count). I'm dying to go to another country, preferably Paris, but I know that would cost money that I won't have anytime soon. For the present, a trip to Hollywood or Disneyland would suit me just fine. Baby steps. I currently live in Staten Island with my close friend Luz, her mom, her neice, and my sister. Privacy is a foreign term to me.

I am currently working as a receptionist in spa in midtown Manhattan. I am currently looking for a second job and will keep those of you that care posted on whether or not I manage to land one. I have been working in various places since I was 16, I can't remember a time when I didn't really have bills to pay. Its even tougher now that I've moved out of my moms house to live with my roommate and sis, but we are all getting by somehow. In order to make things a bit easier for myself I might have to try and control my shopping addiction. Baby steps.

There is currently a guy friend in my life, but things are a bit cryptic right now so I'm hestitant to go into detail about him. I will say that the more we spend time together the more I like him...and wonder we are going, but that's all for another blog post. He is a bit older than me and does a bit of acting. His sense of humor is what does it for me I guess. I'm a sucker for comedians.

Like, almost every other blogger I have writing aspirations. I'm pretty practical about my writing and am not putting all my bets on making a career for myself in it. Maybe I should, but I can't afford to right now. I would love to have a job involving children. I don't think it would feel like work then. Kids tend to make everything feel special, since they tend to see a lot of the things for the first time. Everything would feel like a new experience.

As of now I'm kind of floating. I wouldn't call myself lost....maybe I'm just wondering. I'm like a tourist exploring my own life. For that reason I might not have been able to describe myself adequately. You guys be the judge of that. I think I might end this blog post with a saying I read somewhere on the internet. I believe it went: "If you can desciribe yourself in a nutshell, wouldn't that make you nuts?" Yeah, its kinda cheesy but whoever said that kinda had a point. At least I think so.....

"So why should we hire you?"

Since I have this big interview Monday I thought it would be fitting that my first blog post should be about how much I absolutely HATE job interviews. I am currently employed but circumstances have come to me now needing a second job. Hopefully me already having a job will decrease some of the desperateness I think I have given off in my previous interviews.

Generally I am a shy person, add that with being put in a situation where I have to put myself in the spotlight and you have me looking painfully awkward. I do believe that my shyness/ awkwardness has cost me more than one job. Let's face it: if you can't sell yourself, no one is buying ( maybe that wasn't the best way to put that...).

As a shy girl the worst types of interviews for me would be the group interviews. Whoever came up with that idea must have been smoking a good grade of crack that day. Basically interviews where you are in a group come down to survivors of the fittest. I have actually been in group interviews where some of the applicants put the others down to make themselves look better. Did this work for them? I don't know, but I can say with 100% authority that being shy and modest does not.

The one on one interviews are slightly better for me. For me, an interview should be about the skills you posses and how quickly you can be trained. You can't really gauge that in a group but one on one slightly increases your odds. Basically I believe that YOUR interview should be about YOU, not 10 other people all willing to eat each other alive for the same position.

Now for the questions. If you are over 16 and have ever held a job there is a pretty big chance that you know exactly what you will be asked on a job interview. There are the occasional wild cards, but if you are applying to a regular minimum wage job they want to only know the basics. Most employers that I have met mostly want their applicants in and out. Therefore, they ask questions with no frills. Meaning, if you are right for the job you should have no trouble answering them ( of course there are those who tend to become completely petrified and choke up, but that's for another blog post).

My whole issue with the "questions" is that they are so common now that everyone knows what to say. Sounds good, right? Wrong. Now you can go into an interview saying all the right things and still not get hired. This sounds normal in theory ( you have to back up what you say, of course), but what if you have little to none experience in the required field? Then knowing all the right answers is pretty much all you have going for you. Let's take waitressing for example, something that sounds like you don't need to be too qualified in. Before I landed my current job, I applied for dozens of waitress/hostessing positions. All said I had the look and drive, but that they would rather hire someone that didn't need to be trained.

That's what it all comes down to, I think. A lot of employers are taking the easy way out by not hiring people who have no experience though they might have the potential. This causes a dilemma for us young job seekers out there. How are we supposed to gain experience if we aren't given a chance?

If you're like me, maybe you aren't the best at putting yourself on display. So when you are asked why you should be hired you might be able to think of a 100 reasons but just not be able to formulate them or come off as arrogant. However I think that the answer is rarely listened to anyway. These are all the things that will be running in my head for the next two days as I prepare to be dissected....I mean interviewed. Here's to hoping that this one might turn out different.